A surreal experience

I finished my last cadaver lab today. I know as I go forward in my medical career I will see things that sadden me, amaze me, confuse me and maybe forever change me. So far I have been around those who are at the end of their life or their life has ended. There was a cadaver of a women in our labs who was the same age as me. She died from breast cancer, she had refused any medical treatment. I don't know why, it could have been for religious reasons, it could have been out of fear, or maybe she felt as soon as someone said that death may be near she gave up on life at that moment. I think the last scenario bothers me most; the thought of not wanting to live, not wanting to experience what a precious gift that we have been given to experience a mortal life on this earth.

I am fascinated by human nature in general. I love to watch and observe those around me. I wonder about the other cadavers in the lab. They were older and had lived a full life. Were their lives happy? Were they surrounded by loved ones? Did they isolate themselves and live a life of bitterness and anger? I would wonder the same thing when I worked in the assisted living center. Their were residents who's rooms were filled with pictures of families and pictures drawn by their great-grandchildren. Then there were those who's rooms were bare and no visitors came to see them. Were these isolated residents abandoned by their loved ones or did the resident isolate themselves? It is an amazing thing that the person with the bare room could have millions of dollars in his bank account but at the end of our life those that we surround ourselves with and love become our greatest treasures and worth more then any material thing.

Our attitudes is the most important thing on how we conduct our life. It is the factor that determines who and what is in our lives If we have the right attitude everything else will fall into its place:

" The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life. Attitude, to me, is more important than facts. It is more important than the past, the education, the money, than what other people think or say or do. It is more important than appearance, giftedness or skill. It will make or break a company...a church...a home. The remarkable thing is we have a choice everyday regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day. We cannot change our past... we cannot change the fact people will act in a certain way. We cannot change the inevitable. the only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude. I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% of how I react to it. And so it is with you...we are in charge of our attitudes." .....Charles R. Swindoll.

What was the attitude of this young women who had passed away from breast cancer? What was the attitude of the lonely residents in the assisted living center? I hope I would fight with everything I had for life. I hope my walls are covered with pictures drawn by my great-grandchildren. My attitude is maturing and growing. I am learning to let go when it is time to let go and react with an attitude that will help me grow. I am in charge of my attitude and in turn I am in charge of my happiness